“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” — Leo Buscaglia
Kindness can be divided into many pieces, very similar to a puzzle. Close your eyes, visualize a beautiful flower, this flower represents kindness. Now, focus on each pedal, replace them with tiny beautiful puzzle pieces. Take a deep breath and blow, just like you did as a child making a wish with a Dandelion. Imagine each little puzzle pedal gracefully dispersing through the air. Swirling and riding the waves of the wind, until each piece lands in a different place. Effortless, calming, beautiful! As easy as a Dandelion pedal flies, kindness is spread. What is left is the choice. Choosing kindness can be reactive or proactive. Either way, it is an action that will only breed positive consequences.
photo: image.spreadshirtmedia.com
REACTIVE KINDNESS:
Life is hard! Every person that you come across is in a personal storm. It does not matter the size of their storm, nor what they vs. the next person considers a storm. What is important, is WHY they are in a storm (Problem) and HOW can their storm be calmed (Solution).
One of the first lessons I learned in business school was never to bring the problem to the table! Rather, bring multiple solutions to fix the problem at hand. Combining this simple principle with observation and empathy, inevitably kindness is fostered.
Problem:
An elderly couple is holding up the line at the grocery store. With only a few items in their cart, it is evident there is something else going on. Also clear, is that a select few are grumbling and very agitated for having to wait.
Storm:
Trying their best and embarrassed! You see, Mr. and Mrs. Jaster could not have children. They are also the last surviving members of both sides of their family. No one is left to help with their errands. Also, their limited income prevents them from being able to hire help.
Solution:
After observing the problem, foster kindness with empathy. Set your items aside, and offer to help Mr. and Mrs. Jaster. While assisting them, engage in friendly conversation. Also, if possible (and if deemed safe), offer your email or phone number. If they are ever in need, they can call for assistance. They are not alone in this world!
***
Problem:
The blue Dodge Journey that ran the red light caused an unavoidable chain reaction. Multiple vehicles stopped, confusion ensued, and road rage sparked. The driver of the Dodge, a young woman, appeared flustered with tears in her eyes. She, frazzled with panic and fear.
Storm:
Andrea Clark’s daughter, Amelia was in the back seat, suffering from an asthma attack. Mrs. Clark was speeding to rush her daughter to the local urgent care before she became unconscious. Amelia’s inhaler was not functioning properly, and each puff furthered her distress and was not opening up her airways. Andrea Clark was new to our city and unsure of the urgent care’s location.
Solution:
Observing Mrs. Clark’s distress vs. the other confusion and anger. Follow her safely to the next light or stop sign. Roll down your window, and ask if help is needed. A child in distress, a scared mother in an unfamiliar town. The solution is easy! “Let’s go, follow me, and I will lead the way!”
***
In both scenarios, Mr. and Mrs. Jaster and Mrs. Clark were dealing with a personal storm that was out of their control. With a little observation, an empathetic heart, and a willingness to step in — both situations were able to be diffused with kindness. Often I have learned that kindness is also contagious. The person, who is most aggravated is most likely in their storm, but by witnessing a helpful hand — a simple act of selflessness, they will think twice and then step up themselves.
“Remember there’s no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end.” — Scott Adams
PROACTIVE KINDNESS:
Mindset is everything! Mindset controls emotion, and naturally, a negative mindset grows a negative emotion. A positive mindset grows a positive emotion. By nature, negative emotions are stronger than positive emotions in most cases. Controlling one’s thoughts is extremely difficult but influencing those thoughts is much easier.
For instance, take that same kindness flower; if the pedals are the reactive kindness, then think of the flower seeds as the proactive kindness. Planting just one seed will grow a kindness flower filled with puzzle pedals ready to ride the wind waves with one big blow. Each seed, each flower, spreads multiple kindness ripples into the world. Repeat and share, build and grow.
***
Compliment Seed
Hi Mrs. Jaster, I noticed your new coat, very trendy — a good pick! The color suits you well! I bet Mr. Jester agrees!
Surprise Seed
Mrs. Clark wrote sticky notes to Amelia for school:
Opening her book bag: “Have a good day!”.
Opening her lunch box:”Mommy loves you!”.
Turning on her iPad: “Today’s reminder: Smile!
photo: ipinimg.com
Generosity Seed
Mr. and Mrs. Jaster cleaned out their pantry. They packaged their items up and dropped them off at their local food bank.
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“Gentleness, self-sacrifice, and generosity are the exclusive possession of no one race or religion.” — Mahatma Gandhi
Become a gardener with me, help me plant the seeds that foster and spread kindness!
Remember, kindness is contagious!
